Meron pa bang Courtship sa Ngayon?

[Weird_O]

there are some cases na NO means something else...

like, NO, but please continue courting me... it has something to do with how it was delivered. If it was a violent NO. That's a no. If it was a NO, with a little smile and wink, that's another game. Or if it was said in a dumbfounded manner like huh ikaw bahala, and then disappears or avoids you completely. Take the hint, she doesn't really want to have anything to do with you. Period. She does not want to hurt your feelings especially if she's a close friend. But then again, you don't say puwede ba manligaw to your friend. You just say, I think I'm in love with you. Then leave it at that. and that's another story.

[irresistible]

para kasing isang tanong, isang sagot: "pwede bang manligaw?" The guy is placing the girl in a tight situation here (pressuring her dis/approval) as much as he is also placing himself at risk of being rejected--right then and there! HEHEHE... ;D

Bluntly put, the question demands for either a YES or NO answer. accept or reject? Given that the girl says NO, guys, take it seriously; wag nang umasa pa. ung mga sagot na NO pero may hidden meaning eh nakakainis tlg gawin man ito ng babae o lalaki. take it (not as a subtle but a strong & obvious) hint that a girl (or a guy) who is double-minded or just beating around the bush is not worth a dime of anyone's time, effort & affection. we owe honesty & sincerity to each other in courtships and it works both ways. if the guy straightforwardly asks, "pwede bang manligaw?" give a straigthforward answer as well. pag sinagot na firm NO, stop pursuing her.

If she says YES naman, wag ka ding aasa na there's a huge possibility na mapapasagot mo sya--right away. ang yabang naman ng dating mo nun. LOL. I knew a lot of guys who act that way after popping that stupid question. Feeling cla na. Hello?! She is just giving you a chance to prove your worth. Kaya, gudluck na lng!

What if she says, "i'll think about it?" (parang gawain ko ata 'to.. hehehehe ;D)

Weird_O, may mga guys na nagsasabi na mahal nila ang isang girl pero parang wlang hint o balak na manligaw o magcommit.. labo no? kaya kurek ka pag cnabi yan, that's another story!! e pano kung, "i love u and i want to start a courtship with u"? How does that one sound?

haaayyy.. ewan! kanya-kanyang style (na bulok) lang yan. . . ;D

[Weird_O]

"I'll think about it"... is a way of avoiding to decide the matter right there and then. It just says, yes I think I'll consider you for the meantime to be a candidate, but just hang in there am trying to sort myself out. ;D The very essence of the phrase means you could be the one but still... the catch here is the BUT. It means demanding more out of you... what else can you prove... or something like that. OR this is the silliest part I could ever think of, she wants you but still wants to feel being pursued.

-----> On "I love yous and commitments"

What's the perfect word to describe your feeling for a friend? If its intimacy that you want without breaking the boundary of friendship it doesn't need or entail that you have to tell her "I love you". It means something else if you have an intent.

Maybe the word "I love you" [with intent] without asking anything more from you means he leaves a space for you to think about the declaration of love. Maybe he sees more of what you currently want for both of you. It doesn't mean he doesn't want to commit... maybe he just wanted for you to feel at ease before putting both of you to a situation where the courtship begins. If you don't feel it was right, both parties can either back off to status quo or break the friendship altogether, nobody none the wiser and nobody gets hurt... ;D except maybe him, if he really feels something for you.

-----> "I love you and I want to start courting you."
Like I said before, it all boils down to how much or how deep the foundation of friendship. If it has no depth theres no hesitancy of telling him No, if you really don't want to, but if the friendship has depth and meaningful saying no is hard to do. It all boils down to, I love you... don't add start courting with you... just show up one day with something and to hell with it. Prove your love and maybe it will be reciprocated in kind.

[dobby]

Weird_O said:

OR this is the silliest part I could ever think of, she wants you but still wants to feel being pursued.

yah right!

Weird_O said:

What's the perfect word to describe your feeling for a friend? If its intimacy that you want without breaking the boundary of friendship it doesn't need or entail that you have to tell her "I love you". It means something else if you have an intent.

ah parang "kissing friends" kayo

Weird_O said:

If you don't feel it was right, both parties can either back off to status quo or break the friendship altogether, nobody none the wiser and nobody gets hurt... ;D except maybe him, if he really feels something for you.

kaya before telling your feelings to your "good friend" you have to be sure if ds is LOVE bcoz it wouldn't be the same anymore after you told him/her your feelings

[Weird_O]

dobby said:

yah right!

sandale, admit it or not... may mga cases na ganito ang attitude ng mga girls... kaya nga its the silliest thing I could ever think of e. ;D

dobby said:

ah parang "kissing friends" kayo

completely misunderstood. not kissing friends per se... parang iba naman ata yun. I meant is, you could be intimate [not physical] on the scale that you can be close without broaching the boundaries between friendship and something else. So you don't have to say I love you, even if you meant it in another way.

What irresistible is saying was that, guys says I love you but it has nothing behind it. Hollow. There's no plans of pursuing or courting the girl.

dobby said:

kaya before telling your feelings to your "good friend" you have to be sure if ds is LOVE bcoz it wouldn't be the same anymore after you told him/her your feelings

I agree with you. Sometimes you gotta think a hundred times before going over the line. Consequences be d**ned kind of attitude leaves you nothing but grief and a lot of hurt feelings on your wake.